Have problems saying no? Maybe you have too much on your plate to deal with, or maybe you’re just indifferent and don't want to say yes.

Whatever it is, we don't know your life story, but if you're being put out, then here's a ‘how to say no’ guide you mightn’t have thought of. *Seriously though, it’s just a humorous read for your Thursday and not to be taken literally (but who are we to stop you?).

1.    Channel your inner politician

Give a long-winded speech that doesn't make ANY sense about how you value this amazing opportunity, but you have to consider all factors before making an informed decision. Then slowly back out of the room and never give a straight answer.

2.    Pretend like you didn't hear their question

If you're on your computer while they ask you, keep hitting the keys louder and more rapidly to pretend like you can’t hear them over your dedication to your work. If they persist, say, "Oh, sorry! I was just practising my selective hearing. It's a skill I've been working on lately."

3.    Have an excellent excuse to leave the conversation

This would work better for zoom, but desperate times call for desperate measures. If they ask you to do something you seriously want to decline, then pretend your phone is ringing and you have to answer it—now it's time to put on your De Niro skills. If you’re on a zoom, suddenly stand up and repeat the same phrases of 'that’s awful’ and 'I can't believe it'. If you really want to sell your performance start pacing around the room.

Suddenly close your laptop lid in a panic acting like you have an emergency to deal with and pretend you forgot about the zoom call. If they mention it again in the future, say you can't bear to talk about it yet because it reminds you of your 'latest emergency'.

4.    Make the person uncomfortable

If they've made you uncomfortable with asking you of something, pull a uno-reverse card. If you'd rather poke your eyeballs out than say yes, then blankly stare off into space for a solid 10 seconds to make it awkward before changing the topic.

5.    Blame it on the stars

Pretend you're suddenly an astrology enthusiast, "I'm sorry, I can't make any big decisions right now because Mercury is in retrograde, and I can't risk it. Don't blame it on me; blame it on my star sign."

6.    Try a Jedi Mind Trick

When you're asked something, you don't want to do, simply wave your hand, and say, 'I'm not the person you're looking for'. If your colleague persists, just keep repeating it on loop. It’ll probably take a few tries, but eventually they'll fall for your trick and walk away.

Any that you think we missed? How do you say no?

On a serious note, do you have a question for us? If you're a job seeker on the lookout for your next role or a hiring manager looking to fill a position, contact us at Just Digital People! We're here to help you succeed.